VIEWS FROM A BROAD

"The Dictator" Releases Statement Over Oscar Banning! (or Publicity stunt?)

With all the ups and downs surrounding the Academy Awards this year, the last thing they want is to turn their star-studded fasion freak show into a, well... freak show.

After word got out that "Dictator" creator Sacha Baron Cohen wanted to attend the awards fest as his most recent character (and not as himself, representing Best Picture nominee Hugo), the Academy was quick to the defense when rumors of Cohen's banning began to circulate:

"We haven't banned him," an Academy spokesperson tells The Hollywood Reporter. "We're just waiting to hear what he's going to do."

Still, the Academy is making it clear that Cohen is not welcome to use the red carpet as a platform for a promotional stunt for his upcoming movie The Dictator...

Appearing on the Today Show, Admiral General Aladeen (Cohen's The Dictator character) had a few choice words not only for the Academy, but for America as well, plus some extra props to host Billy Crystal.

"I am OUTRAGED at being banned from The Oscars by the  Academy Of Motion Pictures Arts and Zionists.”

He adds, "While I applaud the academy for taking away my right to free speech ... I warn you that if you do not lift your sanctions and give me my tickets back by 12 PM on Sunday, you will face unimaginable consequences!"

Hopefully these consequences don't include appearing on the Red Carpet in a mankini made popular by Cohen's previous character and film-star Borat. If his hair and beard are any indication, I'm sure his man bits would look something along the lines of two plums dressed as Treasure Trolls for Halloween.

But Cohen, not shy to push the bar, may still have something up his sleeve. Will he let the Academy "dicate" the Dictator? I'll have to watch on February 26th to see!

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Florida Man arrested for making Animals Noise and Masturbating on Bonita Beach

Nothing screams family day at the beach then having some Pervert Making animals noises and fondling himself on the sand.

and its Florida folks..

Meet  Miguel Angel Rivera Flores.. someone had complained that some dude was trying to attract  the attention of passing females and children with animal noises and then exposing and masturbating in front of them.

Deputies said Flores had been caught before by Lee County Parks and Recreation masturbating to women using the outside showers at Bonita Beach Park.

STORY HERE

 

Man Burgles And Molests Lab: Breaking and Entering... And Entering... And Entering...

Picture it. Westchester County. 2012. Mere months after gay marriage is made legal in the state of New York, the worst fears of right-wingers and Santorum-ites have come true; man on dog sex hits the public spotlight....

 

... Carnal canine passions flow freely in the street. The howls of hounds and the hoots of horny he-men fill the halls of apartment buildings, hotels and bath houses across the state. And it all started with one man and his furry, four-legged lover.  That man is Kujtim Nicaj. And that lucious lab belonged to his neighbor.

OK, so maybe the whole frolicking in the streets thing is a bit of a stretch, but that's exactly what those crazy conserves want you to think.  The truth of the matter is Mr. Nicaj is/was a happily (I guess) married father of two who worked as a superintendent at the Rye Colony apartment complex.

“It’s unbelievable,” said Kris Lumaj, who does renovation work at Rye Colony and has known the super for years. “That’s an animal, you know. He’s got a wife and two kids, has no criminal record. I don’t know anybody who’d say anything bad about him.”

After suspecting someone entering her home (and in this case, her pet pooch), a resident set up a spy cam and apparently caught Mr. Nicaj hitting it doggy-style. While neither the defendant nor his lawyer has seen the video, they both deny Mr. Nicaj committed the acts of puppy pleasure.

I guess the thought on everyone's mind would be "I hope the babies take after their mother..."  This world is going to the dogs... wah wah.

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Toddlers and Tiaras Tot Wears Pretty Woman Prostitute Costume..WTF? Hello Pedophiles!

Ya know there are a bunch of perv pedophiles whackin off to this BS every week.. its ProstiTOT time! y dont put a 3 yr old in  Hooker attiere

On Wednesday night's Toddlers and Tiaras, 3-year-old Paisley wore a pageant costume based on Julia Roberts' prostitute character in Pretty Woman.

Paisley's mother, Wendy Dickey, told TMZ: "I'm raising my child just as well as any mother does … I take my kid to church every week."

"Everyone in the room was laughing hysterically," Dickey added. "It was meant to be funny, not sexual at all. I made the dress myself! It barely went above the knee, very non-revealing and non-sexy."

JESUS has appeared on a telephone pole in Littleton, Colorado . ( could it have started with a package of blessed Burpee seeds?)

It's a 765,000 volt Miracle...

According to a man in Colorado, a leafy green JESUS has grown on a telephone pole by his house.

 Don Taylor of Littleton, Colorado says he's, quote, "a nonreligious individual" . . . but he was shocked when he saw that vines and branches had grown in the shape of Jesus on the cross . . . on the pole.

Local authorities have warned people that if they come to see the leafy Jesus, they shouldn't climb up to it . . . because there'd be a serious risk of them getting hit with 765,000 volts of divine intervention.