Not excited that it's Valentine's Day? Maybe it's because of something on this list of the Top Signs Your Valentine's Day is Gonna Suck BIG TIME
Notice how you woke up in bed alone? There ya go
Your lover sends you flowers at work . . . while your husband/wife is visiting.
Three minutes after picking you up, your blind date covers your mouth with a funny-smelling rag and says, "This hurts me more than it does you."
Your wife just called and asked you to pick up maxi pads on your way home from work
As usual, he's going to think that just because he sprang for a stuffed bear and dinner at Applebee's with a coupon, he gets anal.
After getting matching tattoos, your girlfriend just casually asked if anyone knew whether Hepatitis was contagious.
Even though she's treating you to a romantic dinner, there's still something weird about going on a date with your mom.
No matter how many times you get naked and hide in his dressing room, Justin Bieber STILL doesn't understand you and he were meant to be together
When your girl said she wanted chocolate, she meant DeAndre from next door.
It's just you and your wine and your cats and Bravo TV. And you're a dude.
Her prison isn't doing conjugal visits today.
