VIEWS FROM A BROAD

TOP SIGNS YOU'RE AT A BAD HAUNTED HOUSE

There will be plenty to choose from this weekend, so to make sure you don't waste precious minutes visiting the wrong one, check out today's list of the Top Signs You're at a Bad Haunted House.

To save money on toothless ghouls, they just hire NASCAR fans.

Instead of a chainsaw, the psycho killer chases you with a slap-chop.

Ghosts don't actually rattle chains.  They have an app for that.

The funhouse mirrors make you look fat.  Then you realize they're just regular mirrors.

The only moaning comes from the hooker Charlie Sheen locked in the closet.

You can tell the neck bolts are rubber on the Khloe Kardashian costume.

Not a single black person is being vocal.

The only ghost who reaches out and grabs kids is Michael Jackson.

The Wolfman won't stop humping your leg.

The scary music playing?  Justin Bieber.

The cobwebs are from Betty White's cooter.

The only time you sense the presence of evil is when somebody comes out of the bathroom.

They say it's full of monsters, but not once do you see Sarah Palin.

The only thing scary about the house is that it's in Detroit.

14 yr old Kendall Jenner (Kartrashian) enters the music video world lookin like...well...you decide

Lets see they stuck her half naked on the beach for bikini shoot..and NOW at 14 yrs old..Shes playing well.. Looks like a lil tramp..Sorry ..but you dont dress your 14 yr old up as a slut and promote her.. to the world. I'm sorry... its like How much more do the Kartrashian Shill family want? her  initial video appearance in One Call's new offering titled "BlackLight".

We shouldn't worry about China having wqorld domination..we should should worry about this fame whore family... Kim Kloe take Mahattan- miami- Los Angeles...and now they are portraying to 14 yr old its ok to look like a slut.. ( hey if big sis can suck dick in home porn and make millions..SO CAN YOU!)

another AUTO TUNED Wonder

 

Portia De Rossi once weighed 82 pounds on 300 calorie-a-day diet

Thank gawd she ate something!

The actress, who is married to Ellen DeGeneres, has opened up about her battle with anorexia in her new book Unbearable Lightness - and she fought back tears as she talked frankly about her lowest period during a recent taped interview with Oprah Winfrey.

In the tearful chat, which will air in America on Monday, the Australia-born star reveals she once weighed just 82 pounds.

She says, "It wasn't that I was proud of it, but it was certainly a recognition for my self-control. I definitely had some pretty amazing willpower to get down to 82 pounds. And that's what I was holding onto to. I didn't think about anything else."

WENN SHOWBIZ

Randy Travis and wife-manager, Elizabeth, divorce! ( I guess their Love is NOT deeper then the Holler..)

and of course the rumors of Randys sexual preference have spurred stories for years.. he does have the highest forehead in country music..

NASHVILLE, Tenn. (AP) - Randy Travis and his wife-manager Elizabeth Travis have divorced. Family spokeswoman Maureen O'Connor confirmed to The Associated Press on Friday that the divorce was final.

No further details were given, but an earlier statement that the couple had "parted ways" said Elizabeth Travis would continue to be Travis' personal manager. The statement said the couple would have no further comment and asked for "respect for their privacy during this time."

Neither could be reached for comment.

A petition for dissolution of marriage was filed by Randy Travis in Albuquerque, N.M., on Thursday. They have a home in Santa Fe. The petition calls for an equal split of assets, but offers no clues about why the Travises split, other than saying a "state of incompatibility exists between the parties."

The couple has had a 34-year business and personal relationship that began when a teenage Travis won a talent contest at the Charlotte, N.C., nightclub his future wife owned in the mid-1970s with her first husband. They married in 1991.

 

THIS DAY IN MUSIC HISTORY... OCTOBER 30

1970 - Jim Morrison was sentenced to 6 months in jail and fined $500 for exposing himself in Miami, FL.

1973 - John Lennon released the album "Mind Games."

1974 - Kathy Silva files for a divorce from Sylvester Stewart and was awarded custody of their 14-month-old son. Stewart disappeared with his son and was believed to be in hiding.

1978 - The movie "KISS Meets the Phantom of the Park" aired on NBC-TV.

1982 - Paul Weller announced the breakup of The Jam.

1984 - Linda Ronstadt made her operatic debut in "La Boheme" in New York City, NY.

1984 - Barry Manilow opened at Radio City Music Hall in New York. The shows sold out for $1.9 million. Manilow beat the previous record by $100,000 that was held by Diana Ross.

1986 - The Beastie Boys released the LP "License To Ill."

1988 - Kurt Cobain smashed his very first guitar.

1995 - David Bowie, Tom Donahue, Gladys Knight & The Pips, Pete Seeger, Jefferson Airplane, Little Willie John, Pink Floyd, The Shirelles and The Velvet Underground are inducted into the Rock & Roll Hall Of Fame.

1997 - Sally Nyolo (formerly of Zap Mama) began her first U.S. tour.

1997 - The U.S. Senate passd the "La Cienega" bill. The bill closed a loophole in the 1909 copyright act that put most pre-1978 music copyrights in jeopardy.

2001 - Michael Jackson's album entitled "Invincible" was released.

2002 - U.S. President George W. Bush signed an act that renamed the Oakwood Postal Station in Los Angeles the Nat King Cole Post Office.