I'm going to be completely honest with you: I don't know whether this next story is 100% true. But it's Friday. And if that means you're making plans to get hammered with your friends and do incredibly dumb stuff, you NEED to hear this.
It concerns an unfortunate and unidentified 59-year-old chef in Sichuan, China. (That's a province in the southwest part of China. Near the Himalayas and Tibet. But you knew that.)
But the doctors there couldn't figure out what was wrong. So they performed something called a laparotomy. That's a surgical procedure where they cut into your abdominal wall and look around. So what'd they find?
A 50-centimeter-long ASIAN SWAMP EEL, lodged in the guy's rectal region. The eel was dead, but the damage was done: It had bitten through the guy's intestine, and he died ten days later from the infection.
Basically, our unnamed chef buddy had gotten completely loaded with his friends, passed out, and left himself at their mercies. As every guy who's passed out in front of his buddies knows: Bad Move.
But instead of drawing on the guy's face with marker and taking embarrassing photos like other 50-year-old drunk Chinese men . . . they actually WENT THERE. And as a joke, they stuffed a live eel up his no-go hole.
